What Makes a Good Coaching Question?
A good employee coaching question is open, short, and free of a hidden suggestion. It starts with what or how, can’t be answered yes or no, and doesn’t contain the answer the manager already has in mind. The test: if the employee could reasonably answer in a way that surprises you, it’s a coaching question.
Two rules cover most of it:
- Avoid “why.” It asks people to justify rather than think. “Why did you do it that way?” becomes “What led you to that approach?”
- Avoid advice wearing a question mark. “Have you thought about talking to Dana?” isn’t a question—it’s an instruction with rising intonation, and employees hear it as one.
The GROW Model: A Structure for Coaching Questions
The GROW model is the most widely used framework for employee coaching conversations, and it’s simple enough to hold in your head mid-meeting.
G — Goal
- What do you want to be different?
- What would a good outcome look like?
- What’s the real challenge for you here?
R — Reality
- What’s happening now?
- What have you already tried?
- What’s getting in the way?
- What’s your part in the situation?
O — Options
- What could you do?
- And what else? (Ask three times. The third answer is usually the best one.)
- What would you advise a colleague in this position?
- What’s the option you’ve been avoiding?
W — Will
- What will you do, and by when?
- What might get in the way?
- What support do you need from me?
- On a scale of 1–10, how likely are you to do this? (Under 8 means the commitment isn’t real—ask what would make it a 9.)
The most common failure is skipping from Goal straight to Will. That’s a status update, not coaching.
Coaching Questions by Situation
When someone is stuck
- What’s the smallest next step?
- What are you assuming here?
- What would need to be true for this to work?
When someone is underperforming
- How do you think it’s going?
- What does success look like in your role, in your words?
- What’s getting in the way that I can’t see?
For career conversations
- What part of your work energizes you most?
- What are you learning right now?
- What would make you consider leaving?
In a regular one-on-one
- What’s the most frustrating part of your week?
- What decision are you sitting on?
- What do you need from me that you haven’t asked for?
After a mistake
- What happened, in your view?
- What would you do differently next time?
- What would have made this easier to catch earlier?
To close any session
- What are you taking away?
- What will you do before we next talk?
Questions to Avoid
| Don’t ask | Ask instead |
| “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” | “What made this hard to raise earlier?” |
| “Have you tried X?” | “What have you already tried?” |
| “Don’t you think you should escalate?” | “What options are you weighing?” |
| “Are you okay?” | “What’s been hardest about this week?” |
| “Do you have any questions?” | “What’s still unclear?” |
Yes/no questions get yes/no answers. Every left-hand version can be closed in a single word, which is exactly what a busy employee will do.
How to Actually Use These
Don’t work through the list—a coaching conversation with a script feels like an interrogation.
Pick three or four that fit the situation, ask one, then stay quiet. The silence is doing more work than the question is; most people fill it with something truer than their first answer. If you’re talking more than 30% of the time, you’ve drifted into advising.
Managers learn this through practice under observation, not through reading lists. Arcora trains managers to run coaching conversations using practice-based formats rather than one-off workshops.
Frequently Asked Questions
How many questions should I ask in a employee coaching session?
Fewer than you’d expect—often four or five across thirty minutes. Depth beats coverage.
What’s the single most useful coaching question?
“And what else?” It surfaces the option people skipped past, and it works almost everywhere.
What if the employee just says “I don’t know”?
Try “What would you say if you did know?” It sounds odd and works surprisingly often. If it still doesn’t land, they may genuinely lack information—teach, then coach.
Do coaching questions work if I’m not their manager?
Yes, often better. Without positional power, employees tend to be more candid.
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